As we all know, the first thing a dog must do when he wakes up in the morning is patrol the house to check for anything suspicious. The second thing a dog must do when he wakes up in the morning is go outside and put fresh marks on his territory. The other morning I determined it was about time I marked the crab apple tree in the front yard again. I strutted over to it, carefully positioned myself, lifted my leg high, and let it rip. Boss Lady reports that I peed about a gallon, with a look of serious concentration on my face the whole time. I'd like to report that the look on Boss Lady's face was one of utmost amusement.
When I'd finished my task I inquired as to the cause of her amusement. It would seem that my aim is not as good as I'd thought. Apparently, nary a drop landed on the crab apple tree. Apparently, I was a good 3" off the bullseye. Considering the nearness of my target, I was downright embarrassed. I hung my head in shame, whilst she giggled and tee-hee'ed about it. After about the 7th insult to my studliness, I was ready to go inside and be done with the whole territory marking thing. I'd just like to tell her that aiming that thing takes quite a bit of practice, nevermind the fact that I don't have any side mirrors to help me. Hmph! It's not like she could have done any better.